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Saturday, January 5, 2013

R. I. P. Angel.

Dearest Reader,

Angel looking like an Angel
I am not going to go into detail about my relationship with Angel (StarOfVenusGirl on LL). I will merely tell you how she affected me and how her death has affected me. I have been in bed crying all day, having a meltdown, uncertain of how to handle the news of the death of my friend. I have been feeling quite needy, helpless, yet comforted by the fact that Angel was a knowing soul, hence her journey has merely just begun.

Due to my understanding of death, there is nothing final about it. I know that Angel is just in another realm now, as she outgrew Earth quite suddenly. I also know that her Earth journey is not done. I know that she will return, as I believe in reincarnation. She might return as a future friend to the children she left behind, or she might return as a future friend for me. All I know is that, she missed her grandmother, and now I am sure that the two of them are catching up on old time, if her granny is still around in that realm.

I know that Angel is still the same soul. One's personality doesn't suddenly change just because you have left your body. As a mother to young kids, I am sure that she is lingering in her children's nursery, looking at the twins that she had just given birth to a few months ago. Also, she is probably relieved of leaving the body and being as she was meant to be, a limitless soul, therefore, although I cry and although I am sad, it is for selfish reasons. She wouldn't have chosen to exit Earth if she didn't desire to do so. She knows exactly what she was doing, why she was doing it now and for whom she was doing it.

Therefore, I have a bittersweet understanding of her death. At one side, I feel cheated that she left. At the other side, I am happy that she has outgrown this place, even if it might be temporarily so. I am quite honored to have known her. I feel very grateful that such an awesome human being came into my life, added value and gave me love. She had such a big heart and she genuinely couldn't do anything but love. Yes, it is unfortunate, but she was too good for Earth. She was too good for all of us as a human. She is now good for us as a soul. In fact, i think she will be more effective this way because now, just the thought of her will bring her to us who love her, and that now, she can be at more than one place at once. I have a spiritual ninja for a friend now, and I am also grateful for that.

After finding out about her death, I was in disbelief. I thought it was a joke. She was young. How could she have a heart attack? Well, as improbable as it was, it happened. Then, as the hours went on after finding out, it slowly dawned on me that she was gone. I then started thinking about my life. I asked myself about who I take for granted, asking myself who I would be distraught about if I were to find out they had passed on. Have I said all my "I love you"s, and have I told everyone what I need to tell them? Have I done everything I desire to the best of my possibilities? Have I been procrastinating about something? Have I been true?

Not her actual ASC for privacy's sake
My friend's death made me realize that I am on the right track. I broke down crying realizing how far I have come. I broke down crying in grief that I didn't need her to die for me to reflect. Then I realized that she died for other people as well who might have not been on point about self-reflection and spiritual growth. She was loved by many people, and I am sure that her death WILL force people to evolve, grow, love and accept a few truths. I know this because my Mars in Leo friend would never die without some huge purpose that will cause drama and growth.

I therefore implore those who are reading this to be mindful of a few things.

1. Don't take your loved ones for granted. Show them your love for them.
2. If you had a month to live, what changes would you make in your life? DO them!
3. Give thanks for all that you have.
4. Don't be afraid to live and love. Don't be afraid of truth and freedom.
5. Banish fear from your life.
6. Do something kind for yourself.
7. Honor your temple (your body) by giving it what it needs to thrive. Don't punish your vessel.
8. Forgive, forget and love the ones who empower you.
9. Be brave. Be your own hero. Be proud to be you!
10. Strive for wisdom.

My friend reminded me that, if I were to die today, I have done all that I desire, within my capabilities and within my resources. I have milked this present moment for all it has. I have said my "I Love YOUs" and I have even said goodbye. I have expressed myself as I am. I have not taken anyone for granted, most of all me.

She loved football and the Redskins
Angel and I had a highly spiritual relationship. I hope to keep in touch with her family because I would like to get to know her children. I would love to tell them about their mother from my perspective because she was an awesome human being and stories about her bravery, tenacity, perseverance and good sense of humour are worthy to be shared.

I am sad to have lost my friend, even though it feels like she is still here. My mind is the only thing that is telling me that she is gone. My heart on the other hand can still feel her. Fortunately, I don't pay attention to my mind when it comes to these matters. I know she is here as I write this. I know that she is not surprised by my words because she knew that this is how I felt about her. She might be surprised that I would like to know her kids, but other than that, she knew how much I loved her because I told her. I suppose this is why it is easier to handle this. I did treat her as if it was the last day of her life, not knowing that it actually was. That is how I treat people. I thank Angel for allowing me to be me again.

Yours Sincerely
Veronnica Wolpendz

Love, Peace and Power!

P.S. Below is an introduction she made when I first came across Angel on a forum called LL.

This was how she introduced herself to us in 2009

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Please please kindly allow me to cook you dinner?

Veronnica Wolpendz said...

LOL! :)

Anonymous said...

She laughs :(